Well I am not really sure what I am today. So badly I want to give up on dieting, life, relationships the whole nine yards.
Bad emotion day for me today. I was touched so much by what Bob said the other day. I was so touched that I was not the only one feeling like that, and also scared that He may really quit. It just got me to thinking.
I mean I sit here today really messed up emotionally. I am tired of being alone. I am tired of dieting, but also tired of being fat. I am tired of life in general I think. The alternative to all of this is......... Well #1 digging a hole and crawling in for about ............hmmmmmmmmmmm ............The rest of my life.( NOT AN OPTION!!). #2 Quitting everything, including life.................(Not an option either). Or #3 Just trying to deal with the day and maybe crying myself into a stupor. (The only one that is actually doable).
I know I get lonely like this sometimes, but I don't remember being this bad in a LONG time. Even after I got scammed and found out Shaun was Fake. I do get down in the dumps sometimes also and just want to change or give up. But that doesn't happen either, I just get over it. And Tired of being fat is what caused me to start NS on the first place.
The part I am having so many troubles with lately is that all of these emotions don't usually hit me all at once. They like the aches and pains I have daily, usually take turns and only hit one at a time. Lately I have been SPECIAL. ALL AT ONCE!! And it is driving me BONKERS!!!!!!!!
Well I will just have to figure out how to deal with it in an OK way. Get into my WORD (Bible) today, Get before God and rest in Him for a while, or Have a good CRY and then Get before God for comforting and rejuvenation. Any or all of the above are good options.
I think I messed up on my dieting so much with weight fluxuation that I didn't think I could make it to my 205 goal for the end of the year. Or even come close to it. I am at 211.8 today and just 6.8 lbs to go to make that 205. Just 1.2 lbs a day for the next 4 days. And LOTS of H2O. So any and ALL of u can keep me in check and accountable for this loss. The closer I get to my mini goals the more I end up sabotaging myself.
So no more cheating on my NS diet, No more thinking about relationships, and no more Mulling over how messed up life is. JUST KICK MYSELF IN THE BUTT AND KEEP GOING!!!!!
Ok so as of today I am at 211.8 Lbs ( I said that already.......LOL) SO I just have 6.8 lbs to go. So THIS TIME FOR REAL!!, I am gonna log everything that passes these LIPS and goes in the mouth. Will update later on the array of ONLY NS diet stuff I eat. LOL..............Even though I REALLY want some of those chips on top of the Fridge. OK I know STEP AWAY FROM THE FRIDGE!!!! Luckily I am still blogging here...........LOL
Well Off to figure out what is for lunch.
Thanks Sue for being concerned and asking for this blog today or I may not have done it.
Well I have babbled on enough and I feel MUCH better.
God Bless U ALL
Sherri G
Subscribe to:
Post Comments (Atom)
3 comments:
Thanks Jen,
I wrote this and felt a lot better. I really need to use this blog to get my mess out of me instead of pushing it down inside so much.
Update on food & Water is coming soon.
Thanks again,
Sherri G
Hey there!
I'm sorry you are feeling down. :( You will make it through and come out stronger and thinner at the end! Just try to get back on track and I think you will be fine. You have proven it to yourself that if you really stick to the plan you lose weight like crazy! I also think god was looking out for you with that guy, so try to keep that in mind.
If you want a good laugh, check out my post from yesterday. LOL!
You have to keep going for you, Sherri! I know how hard it is when the emotions hit all at once. Focus on you and just get through the day one meal at a time. We're all here to help you through the rough spots! Hugs ...
Post a Comment